Christmas Desktop Goodies

My desktop is especially cluttered with treats right now, but I’ll choose a few to share…

I have a massive collection of vintage Krampus greetings, but this one (shared by my friend Kevin) was new to me this year. It is perhaps one of the most ominous holiday greetings in existence.

I suppose there’s also this:

Well, I guess THIS could happen too.

Santa, eat some cookies. This doesn’t look…natural.

Santa’s true anatomy is clearly documented here:

And here:

Hot.

Much jolly-ness…

“Have a Living Christmas Tree Ornament in the House.” Yes folks, remember that pets are nothing more than objects to adorn for your own amusement (I’ve had a few retrospectively comedic instances of people not picking up on my sarcasm, but anyone who has followed this blog knows I adore and respect pets more than most humans).

In the mid 20th century it was proper etiquette to smile during imminent danger.

Okay kids, on the count of three, smile and say FIERY HORROR!

Speaking of…

Ice cream on a tree? I like the way you think.

For some reason I really enjoy this old catalog page, despite not actually liking most of the candy in it (people choose hard candies when chocolate exists?). Points for aesthetics though.

Now for an EEEEEEVIL twist:

And from my Sinister Gift Guide:

Sorry abomindable snowman…I find you kind of adorable.

This entry was posted on December 20, 2011 at 1:54 pm and is filed under absurd, advertising, anatomy, anthropomorphic, antiques, candy coated nightmares, christmas, ephemera, food, humor, monsters, thrift horror, vintage with tags absurd, advertising, anatomy, anthropomorphic, antiques, candy coated nightmares, christmas, ephemera, food, humor, monsters, photography, thrift horror, vintage. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

9 Responses to “Christmas Desktop Goodies”

Christine Hintermeyer Says:
December 20, 2011 at 4:13 pm

Great collection! But I just have to try and ask: What IS that second card where the monkey (?) attacks a yeti (?)?

Reply
- shewalkssoftly Says:
  December 20, 2011 at 4:14 pm
  
  I wish I knew, Christine! Unfortunately, I follow a bunch of Tumblr blogs that never cite their sources. I’d love to see ALL the cards that company produced if I only knew where they came from!
  
  Reply
  - Christine Hintermeyer Says:
    December 20, 2011 at 6:57 pm
    
    And I’m grateful I can use your blog to have the good stuff filtered out for me 😀
    
    I’ve never commented before but I’ve had you on my RSS for a long time – so let me commend your great taste here (which is great because it matches mine, of course…).
    
    I really consider printing out that yeti-monkey thing for next year’s Christmas cards 😀
Comment1 Says:
December 20, 2011 at 5:58 pm

That monkey/yeti thing made me audibly “WTF”. I just can’t think of anything that would lead up to that picture.

I love “celebration bowels”, such a seasonal affliction!

Great collection!

Reply
- shewalkssoftly Says:
  December 21, 2011 at 2:34 am
  
  Haha…I thought you’d get a kick out of that card! I really wish I knew where it came from. Perhaps we are missing out on others.
  
  Reply
Carrie Filetti Says:
December 21, 2011 at 2:26 am

Such fun! I must learn to knit so I can pass out nose warmers next year! Consider one for you!

Reply
- shewalkssoftly Says:
  December 21, 2011 at 2:34 am
  
  Oh Carrie, if you ever do this you MUST send pictures! And I would be forever indebted to anyone who made me a nose warmer. 🙂
  
  Reply
Ronal Says:
February 19, 2013 at 2:31 am

I just love these. What a beautiful baby! All his pruoecis little facial expressions are perfect and you even got his little back wrinkles! Love it!

Reply
beuxehfub Says:
February 22, 2013 at 2:27 am

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Reply