Tag: anthropomorphic

Desktop Goodies: 2/4

February 4th, 2015

You’re being welcomed into this post by anthropomorphic hotdog with breasts.

As far as I can tell, this is a real vintage ad. Probably one of the most jaw-dropping examples I’ve seen.

Imagine this is what you’re really standing on.

I prefer my tables without testicles.

Don’t miss the other title by this author on the bottom.

For “elegant women of refinement and taste.”

Just your average note-wielding mouse on a lobster.

I’m not sure what’s going on here. Is this a medical assistance device? Unless it’s equipped with some sort of pulley mechanism to lift bodies in need, I see very little purpose for lying on something LESS comfortable, a few inches above something designed for lying on.

And now, in today’s installment of unappealing instructional material…Meet the man who can tell you how to lick pimples.

Haunted…

In conclusion, cats are the cure for everything.
Desktop Goodies 1/14

January 14th, 2015

How NOT to decorate your lobster. I call this Stairway to Hell.

Gorgeous carving work.

Enchanting…

Intriguing…

If only humans could leave behind the tangible structure of their own transformations to look back on.

I love how one happy consumer claims that a tablet of soap whittled her waist from 62 to 48 inches.

But some old ads EMBRACED a little junk in the trunk (how anyone thought the name “CHUBETTES” was a winner for a clothing line, I do not know).

Tick tock…

Adorable little skelly and her pet!

This is amazing in so many ways. Was this mushroom an official mascot of some sort, or just a damn fine costume?

This looks like something a child would paint in art class.

Everybody dance now!

Best search query of the week: “Why is Nicholas Cage on the cover of a Serbian Biology textbook?”
Bizarre Vintage New Years Cards

January 1st, 2015

Here is a small collection of vintage greetings to start your year off right.

Well, this is one way to face your demons.

The intoxicated moon has somehow procured a giant cigarette and is rather adept at blowing smoke rings.

There’s probably a story here. Broken glass and an angel making a move…

I completely agree with the look on the bird in short pants.

The source of this card had the perfect caption: “Hallmark, please start making these for a walk of shame card collection, thanks in advance.”

Oddly anthropomorphized bottles making out. One can almost hear the clinking of glass.

Be warned, if you pass out drunk a horse may eat your head while you sleep.

I don’t understand this moon, anatomically.

Ah, a beetle stares into space. Nothing says New Years like that!

Source
Sprookjesbos, The Fairytale Forest

November 24th, 2014

Before the Efteling theme park (the largest in the Netherlands) was opened around these works, ten delightfully unsettling fairytale scenes graced Sprookjesbos.

Dummies based on the darkly nuanced illustrations of Dutch artist Anton Pieck populate fantasy tableaux straight out of European fables.

From the source:
The original set of tableaus contained scenes from such popular stories as Snow White and Sleeping Beauty as well as lesser known tales such as Mother Hulda’s Well and The Frog King. Some of the figures in the scenes were animated with early mechanical effects, and each scene had a voice-box or book that would tell the story associated with it.

Since its inception the collection of scenes continued to grow, building moments from stories ranging from Little Red Riding Hood to The Indian Water Lillies. Each new scene maintained Pieck’s signature style, even as the technology evolved, and even as older fairytale scenes were updated and replaced. Today there are a total 28 scenes, each culled from the fairy tale greats such as Hans Christian Anderson and The Brothers Grimm. And just like the original stories, they continue to prove just a little creepy.

I’d love to see a full photo collection of the pre-Efteling lanscapes.

See the modern park here.
Stephen Gibb

September 22nd, 2014

Stephen Gibb paints comically unsettling bits of surreal scenery, teeming with anthropomorphic foods, inanimate objects and animals.

One of my favorite things about art in this vein is that it seems to gently hint at some rather serious themes…while never taking itself too seriously.

I encourage you to read the titles of each piece, if you explore his online galleries.

From the artist bio:
The gory details…..
Stephen was dropped on his head as a baby while his mother was visiting the Museum of Modern Art. Ever since, he has been drawing, painting and scratching in a non-stop orgy of creation. His paintings are psychological offerings, rich in irony and distortions, bristling with sublime, psychotropic colours. Human forms struggle in an existential blending of mind and machine yet up through the conflict a subtle black humour percolates. Always wear your helmet.

Stephen Gibb
Julianna Menna

March 28th, 2014

From afar, you might think you’re looking at panels and portraits by one of the old masters.

But stepping closer you will see that Julianna Menna’s subjects differ ever so slightly from those in classical portraiture…in that they are inhuman and have no flesh.

Adornments spring from imaginary period costumes, unique yet strangely congruent with something that we…or a vaguely anthropomorphic species…might have invented in another time and place.

Julianna Menna
Holiday Desktop Goodies 12/21

December 21st, 2013

Ready for some creeptastic Christmas treats?

Wait for it…

Cannot type/talk due to severe illness (all words courtesy of voice software or kind typing helpers)…I read and appreciate all comments…Apologies for not being able to respond.
Halloween Countdown: Attack of the Killer Tomatoes Shirt

October 28th, 2013

Due to illness, it’s been well over a year since I’ve done any kind of crafty project. I miss crafting every single day! Although I’m not actually able to leave the house this Halloween, that’s no excuse not to try to make my own fun here!

My lovely cousin Alaine and I had a mini craft party so I could make an idea I had been pondering this past week: ATTACK OF THE KILLER TOMATOES SHIRT!

If you are not familiar with this fine film, it is a must-see for any B-movie fan.

So here’s my shirt. I could see people perusing the booths of horror conventions wearing a fine killer tomato face.

Here it is, stuffed with a pillow, looking all round and evil (I’m way too skinny to give it its rightful shape).

I found a random bottle of green hairspray in the house (jackpot, right?) so I thought I’d make my hair into tomato “vines.” This was a marvelous failure. I couldn’t get much color to actually come out of the bottle, so I ended up with splotchy green patches here and there, and a whole lot of compressed air shooting in my face.

Now look at the camera and say FAIL!

I also made a valiant, though completely unsuccessful, effort with the bathroom mirror to get a picture that showed me with the entire T-shirt. I couldn’t use flash due to the reflection, and without flash I couldn’t stay still enough to get a shot that wasn’t blurry enough to be considered bad conceptual art.

Oh well.

As you may remember from Rabid Mouse Attack, I really enjoy making cheap, cheesy horror costumes. Are you dressing up this year? Did you make a costume?

Cannot type/talk due to severe illness (all words courtesy of voice software or kind typing helpers)…I read and appreciate all comments…Apologies for not being able to respond.
Pre-Treatment Desktop Goodies!

August 24th, 2013

And now a little installment of DG before I go down the medical rabbit hole for an indeterminate period of time.

Man, Edmund’s been talking for a LONG time.

Start ’em young.

Gorgeous vintage Vogue cover by Salvador Dali.

THINK your way to visible virility!

Very little info on this, but wow…

What puffer cake has seen cannot be unseen.

I love this because the skeleton can either be reaching for OR releasing the heart, depending on the eye of the beholder.

The Barbie Dream Snake:

If a higher power exists, I’m sure it speaks through cats exclusively, actually.

“Who you callin’ chicken?”

I wish this were an actual vintage piece.

Tip from the SheWalksSoftly school of psychology: If someone hurts your feelings, sending a greeting card with one of the worst puns on earth is not likely to remedy the relationship.

Now, let’s everybody hope that the doctors have an ALL CHOCOLATE treatment planned for me next week.
Desktop Goodies

May 18th, 2013

Cannot type/talk due to severe illness (all words courtesy of voice software or kind typing helpers)…I read and appreciate all comments…Apologies for not being able to respond.

God, is that you?

No wait, is that you, God?

Not like this.

I’m not sure if this gaping chasm counts as a “neckline.”

The single best, or maybe worst, job in the world.

Now, this is some food I could eat. Does anyone have a copy of this?

Keep in mind they use the word “enjoy” in the broadest possible sense.

This fellow is very open minded…

And let that be a reminder to stay open-minded about the amorous preferences of others.