Archive for the humor Category

The Day My Kid Went Punk

Posted in 80's, absurd, humor, TV, video with tags , , , , on November 23, 2014 by shewalkssoftly

I missed this Afterschool Special growing up, but it’s truly a (temporary spray-on hair color covered) gem. I highly recommend it.

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Terry, the leading man, transforms instantaneously in an airport bathroom from an awkward orchestra geek to the world’s most innocuous punk. Is the resulting appearance-based prejudice he encounters a warning for parents to keep their children from going down this “bad” path, or a commentary on a shallow, judgmental society*?

*They make a point of having Terry save the day for a sad little girl with leg braces…by somehow materializing a doll with identical leg braces…while at a horse stable, after her mother is denied permission to just “strap her to a horse.” I’m not kidding.

Only one thing is certain: the special is entirely ineffective, and quite marvelously fails, at any of its possible aims. In other words: watch this ASAP.

Desktop Goodies 11/15

Posted in absurd, advertising, anatomy, art, Books, candy coated nightmares, humor, sculpture, sea, vintage with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on November 15, 2014 by shewalkssoftly

I’ve always been fascinated by “visible” anatomy models. I finally have a kit, waiting to be built (it’s a real labor of love, as all the organs and parts are white and must be hand painted!). But I look forward to it. Here’s a classic:
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Is he dead in the back of your van?
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A lesser known medical condition…
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Maybe it’s just me, but not once in my life have I thought I’d like to “relax” by having my breasts vibrate.
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If you want to feel like a rainbow threw up on your bed, I’ve got the sheets for you! The lollipop (and satisfied smile) really makes this image.
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Gorgeous pulp art illusion.
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Octopus gargoyle! More buildings need these.
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One of the most breathtaking sand sculptures I’ve ever seen.
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This is a real book. Can you image, even in your wildest dreams, a more romantic title? Nevermind the fact that he appears to be strangling her.
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Wow. Ads have come a long way. Now they only imply that people hate the sight of you.
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Yes, please.
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Most of us probably walk around having no idea how adorable baby llamas are. Now you know.
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Caption contest: what is this bear telling her?
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Crazy Vintage Diet Books

Posted in absurd, Books, food, humor, vintage with tags , , , , on November 12, 2014 by shewalkssoftly

The Sexy Pineapple Diet in Desktops Goodies: Crazy Book Edition inspired this spinoff post about some of the more absurd diet publications of years gone by (for the record, I’m sure many of today’s crazes will eventually be relegated to this category). I had to see what else was lurking in our culture’s weight conscious past. Caution: the final one is actually NSFW.

Oh, to blame every sorry sugar binge I’ve had on the Devil!
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I LOVE the following two.
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icecream“Minimum of willpower!” Now that has an appeal!

grid-cell-11066-1411410778-15THIS, on the other hand…
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Ready to get ribald? No, you’re not ready for these. You’ve been warned.
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I Don’t Get Fashion: 1970’s His N’ Hers

Posted in absurd, advertising, clothing, fashion, humor, retro, vintage with tags , , , , , , on November 7, 2014 by shewalkssoftly

I was only alive for mere months of the 70’s, so I did not have the benefit (detriment?) of seeing these fashions arise and fade organically with the changing times. It’s basically a given that anything worn in one time period will be reviled in another (then worn ironically by hipsters). But…was couples dressing really a thing?

This is, as far as I can tell, an actual catalog item, not a Roman Tarzan Baby Wrestling Champion costume.
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I feel like the outfits on the left are what 70’s superheroes wore on their days off, if not too concerned with safeguarding a secret identity.
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Did no one involved in this entire photoshoot notice that something is missing here? This is not how one leaves leaves the house for (presumably, by the background image) a boat ride.
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“We’re soulmates. We finish each other’s sen…sible mint green mini dress sweaters.”
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This is what happens when you overshoot the mark after practicing your Catalog Faces too hard.
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See more here.

Halloween Countdown: The Devil and Daniel Mouse

Posted in animation, halloween, humor, retro, TV, video with tags , , , , , on October 7, 2014 by shewalkssoftly

My earliest conscious memories involve a (harmless) deep intrigue and love of darkness. As a very young child I used to enjoy traipsing around my local library, looking for spooky goodies. Still do.

Given my innate radar, I was drawn to this box immediately, as it was the only one in the kids section that had a black spine and cover with ominous writing instead of the usual kid-friendly color schemes and bubble letters.

I was further entranced by the Devil’s voluminous neck folds. Admit it…you can’t look away.
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The Devil and Daniel Mouse (loosely based on the Faustian short story The Devil and Daniel Webster), was released as a Halloween special in 1978. Once I found this in the video section, I got my parents to rent it for me multiple times.

The plot (via IMDB):
Finding their audience drying up in favour of rock music, two young mouse folk singers find themselves with a bleak future. Desperate for a better career and life, the female vows that she would do anything to become a rock star. Instantly, the Devil arises to take advantage of that and offers to make her a star in exchange for her soul. She agrees and she quickly becomes the star she’s dreamed of while her boyfriend, Daniel Mouse, is left behind. On the night of her greatest triumph, the devil comes to collect on her soul. In desperation, she turns to Daniel who must attempt the impossible task of trying to find an escape loophole for his girl’s release.

I’ll be straight with you here…The ending is pretty lame. Spoiler alert:

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Despite a deep belief in the transformative power of song, I couldn’t get behind this. Perhaps a testament to the cynicism of my old age, I found myself thinking “A song does not negate a legally binding contract. Oh, come on Dana…it’s a cartoon! Suspension of disbelief! Think of it metaphorically, or something.” And even as a 4 year old I fast forwarded through the (intensely 1970’s) musical interludes. But this whole cartoon is worth it for the perpetually shape-shifting Devil, who is an absolute delight.

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There are many fists of fury poses…
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If you dig retro animation, watch this for good ol’ B.L. Zebub. Let me know what you think!

[Edit] Thank you, Bettie, for reminding me that this was sampled in Bauhaus’s “Party of the 1st Part.”

Desktop Goodies: Crazy Book Edition

Posted in absurd, Books, humor, vintage with tags , , , on September 26, 2014 by shewalkssoftly

My apologies if any of these are repeats. I may have posted one or two of them and accidentally re-saved, but I’m pretty sure almost all of these are new to the blog.

Don’t get me wrong; the best things in life are truly free…but just in case, there’s a book for people who care enough to do the very least.
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This poor man looks like he’s happy as he prepares his wife for the reaping of grim death.
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I wonder how long this book is. How much can be written about this particular subject? Chapter one: turn on water. Chapter two: turn off water. Chapter three: sit in water. Chapter four: get out of water. Did I just write a book?
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Suspend your disbelief…
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It might be difficult for those without a corporeal form to get their hands on this book (literally, I guess). But it’s good to be prepared.
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Best autobiography title I’ve ever seen:
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We all do it:
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I have the power to walk through my house in a sheer negligee with a bouquet of flowers…
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“Erogetic” appears to be a word entirely made up for the sake of this book. But a picture is worth a thousand words.
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Edgar Allen Poe Sweater

Posted in clothing, humor with tags , on September 12, 2014 by shewalkssoftly

Are we ready to get into the spooky spirit of the best time of year? Archie McFee’s is selling this Poe Sweater in the comically accurate One size that fits no one well .

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This is a limited quantity, exclusive item! Some people prefer Halloween to any other holiday and this Edgar Allan Poe Sweater is for them. You could wear it as a Christmas sweater, but it’s designed to be worn on a brisk autumn evening as you contemplate your own mortality while sitting in a graveyard next to an abandoned church. Featuring an honest, but misguided attempt to accurately capture the likeness of Edgar Allan Poe, this sweater is sure to be a conversation piece with you and your friends as you play with a Ouija board and read poetry from your tear-stained journal. This one-size-fits-most sweater is sausage-casing-tight on a 2XL person and awkwardly loose on a medium frame. (I guess that means for me, it’s a dress)

The model photos are amazingly, perfectly awkward.
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Poe Sweater

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